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I Hate Coupons

It’s time that someone finally said it: coupons suck.

I know, I know, there is an incredible thrill that you experience at the store register when you watch the cashier lop some chunky amount off your bill and turn your purchase into a great deal. Believe me, I LOVE that feeling.

Unfortunately, with the total lack of organization–and the complete inability to shop in a planned rather than “oh-shit” reactive fashion–that have overtaken my life since having kids, the number of times I’m able to capitalize on those “great deals” that keep showing up in my mailbox or being handed to me as I leave the register are fewer and fewer.

Sadly, if I counted the number of times I’ve been able to use the coupons that have found their way into my household this year, it would fall to far less than ten. So you know what I’d like to say to all these really generous, unself-interested entities?

STOP SENDING ME COUPONS!

Stop sticking circulars on my doorstep. Stop mailing me those awesome $25 rewards I get for using your credit card but then find a year-and-a half later in my wallet with an expired date. Stop giving me those damn percentage-off coupons as I exit the store, after having laid down $200 on my child’s spring wardrobe. Even if I could afford to come back in 13.5 days as you suggest to spend MORE money at your store, I will never remember to do so or find the time!

Frankly, receiving coupons just depresses me. Every time you give me one, I am reminded that my life is on the edge of reeling out of control and that unlike all my friends and neighbors who have a coupon folder tidily stashed in their trunk, which they remember to sort through just before their preplanned shopping trip, I am just a wannabe economizer with one more area of life that I can’t quite keep up with.

So please oh please, keep your darn coupons. And for those of you who have been selling me clothes with those little ziploc baggies of extra string and buttons, you can keep those too. I’m tired of stowing them in my junk drawer.

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6 Responses to “I Hate Coupons”

  1. What’s even more frustrating is realizing that at some level the store has probably adjusted their pricing in order to be able to offer those coupons. I think coupons are not only frustrating, but they devalue goods and services; the coupon price starts to seem like the fair price of something…

  2. Midnight Mama 28. Mar, 2011 at 7:25 pm

    Hi Gigi,

    You’re right about the devaluing bit. I have two clients (a spa owner and a hair salon owner) and they’ve stopped offering coupons because they feel that customers start to see their services as valued at less than they really are.

    After all my ranting about coupons, I will say that I still try to get good deals with Macy’s. I fail miserably at taking full advantage, but that’s my happy medium…narrowing my bandwidth of coupon use and forgetting all the rest, save for the occasional irresistible deal. Thanks for commenting!

    –Suzanne

  3. I TOTALLY agree, Suzanne! Love the rant and so happy someone else feels this way!

  4. Midnight Mama 12. Apr, 2011 at 2:48 pm

    Well, in my state of absolute optimism, I’ve kept two coupons dated for an April 15th expiration–clothes for me, clothes for kids. Ask me next week if I’ve used them. Not!

  5. I avoid Macy’s BECAUSE I GOT TIRED OF ALL OF THEIR COUPONS! Their constant mailings just annoyed the hell out of me. I found myself repeatedly stuffing their stupid little cards into my already overstuffed wallet and then only returning to toss out the expired ones every so often…
    Suzanne, thank you! I totally agree with you. Sorry to not be more eloquent “this late” at night, but I am a tired mommie. ;)

  6. Thank you! I’m so glad I’m not the only one who feels this way!